I know this is stupid but how exactly do I "jump" those wires on my reverse light switch you mentioned?

Jumping = connecting the two conductors on the harness together.

You will have to get underneath your car to do this. Make sure it is securely supported by jack stands.

Do this with the car off and the ignition turned off.

Unplug the backup light harness from the backup sensor that is screwed into the transmission. Put a paperclip or suitable wire into both poles of the harness (NOT the sensor itself).

When you crawl from underneath the car, turn the key to the ON position and check the backup light. If the light is on, then your backup sensor is bad.

Much thanks, I am on it.