When I dont ease into the throttle when I first start moving the engine revs, and the car doesnt move, then it violently lurches forward, like im popping the clutch on a manual. I have an automatic 1992 bmw 525i 210k miles.

Check the fluid level. There's a specific procedure to follow, which I'm sure is described in this forum somewhere. Try doing a search.

Ordered a transmission kit, and installed it. New gaskets on the big and small pan, and a new filter. Put ATF fluid into it until it started coming out of the hole. No longer does that. What worries me is that there were metal chunks in the oil :eek: